The Journey to Writing a Brother's Obituary: How One Woman Honored Her Brother's Memory After 50 Years

Why it took 50 years for a woman to write her brother’s obituary

For over 50 years, Susan Ehrhart-Morrison carried the weight of her brother's death with her. Bill Ehrhart was a Vietnam veteran who struggled with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and substance abuse after returning from the war. He died in 1970 at the age of 21, and for decades, Susan couldn't bring herself to write his obituary.

It wasn't until the COVID-19 pandemic hit that Susan found the time and space she needed to confront her emotions and share her brother's story with the world. In this article, we'll explore Susan's journey and the challenges she faced in writing her brother's obituary.

The Ehrhart family's story

Bill Ehrhart was born on May 26, 1949, in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. He grew up in a large family with four siblings: three sisters and one brother. As a young man, Bill was an athlete and a musician. He played guitar and sang in a band, and he was a talented baseball player.

In 1968, at the age of 19, Bill was drafted into the United States Army and sent to fight in the Vietnam War. He served as a machine gunner with the 1st Marine Division and was stationed in Quang Tri Province. During his time in Vietnam, Bill witnessed and experienced some of the most brutal and traumatic events of the war.

When Bill returned home from Vietnam in 1969, he struggled to readjust to civilian life. He suffered from PTSD, though at the time, the condition wasn't widely recognized or understood. Bill turned to drugs and alcohol to cope with his trauma, which only made his condition worse.

In 1970, Bill died of an overdose at the age of 21. His death was a devastating blow to his family, who were left to grapple with their grief and the legacy of the Vietnam War.

Why it took 50 years for Susan to write her brother's obituary

Susan Ehrhart-Morrison was 16 years old when her brother died. In the aftermath of his death, she struggled with feelings of guilt and shame. She felt like she had let her brother down by not being able to save him from his struggles with PTSD and addiction.

"I didn't want to tell anyone about my brother's death," Susan said. "I felt like it was a stain on our family's reputation. I was ashamed of what had happened."

For decades, Susan carried this burden with her. She went on to become a successful writer and educator, but she never forgot about her brother or the impact his death had on her and her family.

In 2018, Susan's husband passed away, which prompted her to reflect on her own mortality and the legacy she wanted to leave behind. She realized that she needed to confront her feelings about her brother's death and finally write his obituary.

"It was a long process," Susan said. "I had to dig deep and confront some painful memories and emotions. But I knew that it was something I needed to do."

Writing the obituary

Susan spent months researching and writing her brother's obituary. She talked to family members and friends who knew Bill and read through his old letters and journals. She wanted to create a portrait of her brother that was honest and true to who he was.

"It was important to me to honor my brother's memory and tell his story," Susan said. "I didn't want him to be defined by his struggles with PTSD and addiction. I wanted people to know the person he was before he went to war."

Susan's journey to writing her brother's obituary wasn't without its challenges. One of the biggest hurdles she faced was the lack of information and resources available to her about the Vietnam War and PTSD.

"I realized that there was a lot that I didn't know about the war and its impact on soldiers like my brother," Susan said. "I had to do a lot of research to understand what he went through and the challenges he faced when he came home."

Susan also struggled with the emotions that writing the obituary brought up for her. She had to confront her own feelings of guilt and shame and come to terms with the fact that she couldn't have saved her brother from his struggles.

"It was a painful process, but also a healing one," Susan said. "Writing the obituary allowed me to honor my brother's memory and to let go of some of the guilt and shame that I had been carrying for so long."

Sharing Bill's story with the world

After months of work, Susan finally completed her brother's obituary. She submitted it to the Philadelphia Inquirer, the city's largest newspaper, and it was published in March 2020, just as the COVID-19 pandemic was beginning to take hold in the United States.

The obituary, titled "William J. Ehrhart Jr., 21, War Veteran," told the story of Bill's life and his struggles with PTSD and addiction. It was a powerful tribute to a young man who had been deeply impacted by the Vietnam War.

The obituary struck a chord with readers, many of whom were also grappling with the effects of the pandemic and the trauma of war. It was shared widely on social media and generated a lot of discussion and reflection.

For Susan, seeing her brother's story shared with the world was a cathartic and meaningful experience.

"It was overwhelming to see the response to the obituary," Susan said. "People were reaching out to me to share their own stories of loss and trauma. It made me realize that my brother's story wasn't just about him, it was about so many other people who had been impacted by the war."

Susan hopes that her brother's obituary will serve as a reminder of the human cost of war and the need to support veterans who are struggling with PTSD and addiction.

"I want people to know that my brother's story is just one of many," Susan said. "There are so many veterans who are still dealing with the effects of the Vietnam War and other conflicts. We need to do more to support them and to honor their sacrifices."

Conclusion

Susan Ehrhart-Morrison's journey to writing her brother's obituary is a powerful reminder of the impact of war on soldiers and their families. For over 50 years, Susan carried the weight of her brother's death with her, but through her writing, she was able to honor his memory and share his story with the world.

Writing the obituary wasn't easy for Susan. She had to confront painful emotions and do a lot of research to understand the war and its impact on her brother. But in the end, it was a healing process that allowed her to let go of some of the guilt and shame she had been carrying for so long.

Bill Ehrhart's obituary is a powerful tribute to a young man who was deeply impacted by the Vietnam War. It's a reminder of the human cost of war and the need to support veterans who are struggling with PTSD and addiction. Susan's hope is that her brother's story will inspire others to honor the sacrifices of those who have served their country and to work towards a more peaceful and just world.